We cannot wholly endorse wholesale mockery of a concert dancer, as this kind of goes against our mission, but we can’t deny when it’s done as skillfullly as this and captured on camera.

It does really make us want to mock the mocker, though.

Hey, y’all. I know you to get up close and be near the band and stuff, but, there’s lots of room back over here! By the trashcans!

Really, it doesn’t even smell or anything. Why don’t some of y’all come back here. There’s no smoke or sweaty people. Just me, dancing around. I won’t even bother you. I’ll just do some of my sweet moves and you can watch or jump in or not. You know, whatever. It’s cool.

Come on back, all right?

Please?

Sometimes a musical group will put out its own videos of fans dancing at its own concerts. Sometimes those videos have a lot of people sitting in chairs watching. Such is the case with the band BluzBenders, which as you can see, is rocking parts of Missouri.

Despite what others may tell you, Jackson Moves are a perfectly acceptable form of pre-concert self-entertainment in the event that:

• You are bored.
• The opening act is awful or the main act is running late.
• The people around you are dipshits you aren’t trying to impress anyway.

Do some Jackson Moves if you have to.

Did one of you tell grandma that maybe, perhaps, someday we might think about putting her in a “assisted-living facility?” Not a nursing home. An “assisted-living facility,” which is much nicer, we think.

Well, whichever one of you little bastards yapped, take a look in front of the stage and see what you’ve done.

Now we’ll never get her back in the car.

Just don’t kick us and we’ll be cool, a’ight?

You! Teens who are so young and full of life and not yet beaten down by the weight of the world!

Look upon these two. Do not laugh. Do not mock. Do not cruelly film it on your cell phone and put it on YouTube.

Because once you are 35, this is the coolest you will possibly be. This is it. The ceiling. You will be lucky to be this cool when you are 35.

Now spend the next 20 or so years haunted by that thought.

Shut up, Fosse. I GOT THIS.

… but, OK, you win. Your dad IS pretty awesome.

At about 0:42, this woman proves exactly how hardcore she is.