That’s why they call Paul McCartney a “Sir.” That’s what makes the girls dance this way.

Dear Diary,

Today, I danced out by the Port-a-Potties at the Black Eyed Peas concert. Some girls walked by. One of them got close to me. I wanted to talk to her, but instead I danced.

And then I danced. And then I danced some more. I grooved and I popped and I put a drink on my head to keep me cool and I blew some minds, I think. I really think I got through to some people.

It was a good day.

Yellow Hat Man

And the prophesy did say that one day, a man would come who rolled upon his back while air-guitaring, stood on his mighty feet and stomped like a goose, then bobbed his head with a woman of his choosing like some drunken, magnificent chicken.

Did we cheer when this prophesy, in the year two thousand and ten, did come true.

We did cheer.

Another concert, another couple of girls flailing their arms like odd tropical birds, but the real story here is Mr. Poker Face on the right, trying not to express himself while everything inside him screams, “DANCE! DANCE!”

Also, according to the YouTube description, the guy in front of these girls ended up getting beer spilled all over him. Bonus!

For the first time, we bring you STEREO PEOPLE DANCING AT CONCERTS VISION! A dance so powerful, so important, so mindblowing that you will see it from two different perspectives!

One woman. Multiple hops. Two videos. Two legs and arms. One massive beat (made up of a lot of individual beats). One music break and A Capella breakdown. At least six shimmies. Three WOOs!

You cannot count the value we are bringing to you with mere numbers! You have to feel this. Uh… dawg?

You are welcome, Internet!

We don’t watch the show, but we’re pretty sure this dance was included in its entirety on an episode of Treme last season.

“Yes! This is what they said college would be like and they were so right!”

You are either on board or you must exit to the side right now.

ON OR OFF!?! DECIDE!

Hey, y’all. I know you to get up close and be near the band and stuff, but, there’s lots of room back over here! By the trashcans!

Really, it doesn’t even smell or anything. Why don’t some of y’all come back here. There’s no smoke or sweaty people. Just me, dancing around. I won’t even bother you. I’ll just do some of my sweet moves and you can watch or jump in or not. You know, whatever. It’s cool.

Come on back, all right?

Please?

Despite what others may tell you, Jackson Moves are a perfectly acceptable form of pre-concert self-entertainment in the event that:

• You are bored.
• The opening act is awful or the main act is running late.
• The people around you are dipshits you aren’t trying to impress anyway.

Do some Jackson Moves if you have to.