For the first time, we bring you STEREO PEOPLE DANCING AT CONCERTS VISION! A dance so powerful, so important, so mindblowing that you will see it from two different perspectives!

One woman. Multiple hops. Two videos. Two legs and arms. One massive beat (made up of a lot of individual beats). One music break and A Capella breakdown. At least six shimmies. Three WOOs!

You cannot count the value we are bringing to you with mere numbers! You have to feel this. Uh… dawg?

You are welcome, Internet!

“Yes! This is what they said college would be like and they were so right!”

You are either on board or you must exit to the side right now.

ON OR OFF!?! DECIDE!

Sometimes a musical group will put out its own videos of fans dancing at its own concerts. Sometimes those videos have a lot of people sitting in chairs watching. Such is the case with the band BluzBenders, which as you can see, is rocking parts of Missouri.

This one won’t seem like much unless you skip ahead or stick with it until about 2:21 when the true glory of this video becomes evident.

You have to be patient with these things sometimes.

These things take effort sometimes. Dancing at a concert in a way that’s worth the attention doesn’t just happen. You gotta start small, get some moves going, start up the cyclone with a little lawnmower pull-cable action.

So… uh… is anybody watching yet? Should I funk it up harder?

As the video evidence suggests, it doesn’t work as a mating dance, it turns out.

You thought you got a good laugh at this guy at the festival, calling him “Cletus” and “Jim Varney” and trying to read the back of his tie-dyed shirt. When he left early, you joked that he was going to fix a carburetor for the Dukes of Hazzard and then make some moonshine for Tom Petty.

Who was laughing hardest when you got home late and found him in bed with your mother in a twisted mass of sunburned limbs and hair?

Who was laughing then?

All too often, during the hot summer outdoor concert season, exhibitionists forget to protect their tender neck backs while standing out from the crowd. Why not wear a head-shirt with extra-long sleeves? You’ll protect not just your neck, but your burn-prone shoulder bone-skin and your in-love-with-dancing handles. You can thank us later when you’re not lying on a bed with unsightly skin-cancer bills!

Stay safe!

Luckily, that’s what’s playing on stage.